Crossroads

I know I haven't written for awhile. This past month has been mad busy. I was working two jobs and going or doing something every weekend. I haven't spent the weekend at home in about a month. Finally, my body said...enough. Last night I quit my second job. I just sat their and with all of this work piled in front of me and stared at the computer screen. The damn thing froze on me! I got so mad that I was about to take the keyboard and smashed it against the screen and that was an obvious sign that I was working too much. After that I walked out, I could not take it anymore. My stomach's been bothering me this past week (stress) and I was dead tired. I know it's pretty trifflin' just to walk out without giving a notice and I am pretty much a hyprocrite since I am an employment advisor, but something had to give. Either deal with one less paycheck, or ignore all of the signs my body is giving me (upset stomach, headache, and fatigue...occasional tightness in the chest)or go to an early grave.

You would think that I would catch up on some rest on the weekends, but they were no better. Though, I was out doing things with my friends, I still needed rest. This past weekend I had the most fun because I did two things I never thought I would do. I went White Water Rafting and camped! My friends and I went to the Poconos and camped up there for a weekend and I had so much fun! Who would have thought that self proclaimed city girl like myself actually liked camping? It was very relaxing sitting around the campfire and looking up at the night sky. I saw a shooting star for the first time! It's so peaceful up there. We ate smores and looked at the Milky Way and picked out some of the constellations. I went white water rafting despite having reservations, well, I was afraid that I was going to fall out of the raft and be left behind, or hit my head on a rock and drown. There were a few scary moments, for example, one of us fell out of the raft, but eventually pulled back into safety, and our raft was stuck on the rock and it almost capsized. I am glad I did it anyway. It mad me much braver and not so damn scared all of the time. I am proud that I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and now I have a new outlook on life.

My body got back at me today. This lingering stomach virus caught up with me and I took a sick day. I got some much needed rest. I feel much better. I am at a crossroads. Another job opened up in my department and I am applying for it. I don't know what's going to happen, but I hope I get it. If not, then I will have to weight out my options. I am ready to to make some life changing decisions.